By Brian Brannon ’11
The Roundup

www.theonion.com

I often find myself coming home after a long day and turning on the news only to be met with stories of warfare, failing economies and Apple product shortages.

After many years of crying after watching such news I found an antidote, TheOnion.com.

Every time I think of an onion I imagine crying because of its offensive vapors.

Likewise, The Onion makes me cry in shear laughter every time I visit.

It provides hard-news stories, television broadcasts and deep political discussion based, largely, on completely imaginary subjects.

For instance a recent article presented on The Onion recently discussed a new Google phone app  that whispers advertisements into the ears of its user.

Whatever comical remedies one needs to lighten their day The Onion provides a wonderful outlet.

www.Zombrex.com

Are you prepared for the coming zombie apocalypse?

Zombrex.com is a website dedicated to the education, prevention and care of all things post-apocalyptical.

Included in the advertisements for the website the site features its trademark product, Zombrex, which inoculates its users from certain strains of the coming plague.

Satirical remarks aside, Zombrex.com is a wonderfully created site geared towards its user killing a few of their boring moments throughout the day.

Additionally it provides a perfect example of how America’s private industry might respond to a plague-like disaster.

If you’re a zombie-fan or just looking to escape a few otherwise mundane moments Zombrex.com is definitely worth looking into.

www.oldspicevoicemail.com/male

Hello, do you wish your voicemail sounded like the sweet sound of manly vibrato?

Well, with the help of Isaiah Mustafa (The Old Spice Man) and a few web designers your bland and depressing voicemail can be turned into an example of pure masculinity.

Oldspicevoicemail.com provides its users with a series of options for customizing their personal voice message into a hysterical and satirical statement.

Some of these options will tell the caller why you can’t answer the phone; whether you are building an orphanage with your bare hands or cracking walnuts with your man mind.

Every audible statement is a recording by Isaiah Mustafa himself to ensure its macho perfection.